Yesterday a big white bowl that I liked dropped out of my hand and shattered across the floor in my dining room. I have never seen so much white glass! The shards, in some instances, maintained the roundness of the curve of the bowl. How that happened when the rest of the bowl was miniscule pieces, is beyond me. I found myself wondering what just happened because I really can't remember the last time that I broke any dishes. I soon discovered that the Universe must have caused this to happen.

This little event was setting off a chain of emotions inside my body and my mind. First, I had to clean up the mess. Picking up each of the pieces was tedious. As I did this, my muscles would cramp and ache. My head hurt. I realized that each piece of the bowl is like an event in my life. It has a different size and shape, and the effort in retrieving it pulled up a wave of feeling. When we pull up past memories, most of them evoke some reaction - emotion or action. I felt uncomfortable with some of the feelings - the events being pulled up were about something that I considered broken. However, under close scrutiny, the situation was not broken, just different than what I wanted it to be. Just like the broken bowl, the memory of the event, and the events that followed it, were a piece that was whole and complete. I just needed to change my perception of what the piece looked like.

I remembered childhood things like gathering up the chicken eggs in the bale stack, and having too many in my hands and breaking them. And, then, my Mom being angry because this was part of our food and I had destroyed it. I remembered driving the first company car and within two days being in an accident that totally destroyed it. I remembered how the glass blew out of the windows of the car and how the policeman came to the car and pulled me out and started picking glass off my hair and face, and yet, I had no scratches, cuts or bruises. I was in one piece.

I thought about so many things. I realized that the shattering bowl released a retaining wall that I had put up around some of my memories. The retaining wall shattered. I had to feel each of the memories. As I cleaned up the bowl, I breathed through the memories. I picked up each piece of memory and put it away. As the bowl ended up in the garbage, there is a tendancy to think that the memories became garbage. That is not what happened. Instead, the pieces of the bowl will be transformed into different energy as it moves towards the garbage dump. My memories were cleared out of my body, and the energy freed up for the Universe to use.

I know my cupboard is minus a bowl, yet I am grateful for the purpose that bowl served. I am grateful, too, for the space that freed up in me. I learned too, that each piece of us that fractures off really is another way of making us into a finer piece.

I wish you shattered dishes to help you with your transformation.

Many blessings,

Judy